Gebgetcimcut is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, emotional dragon.

Gebgetcimcut created the Small Magellanic Cloud seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gebgetcimcut, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gebgetcimcut, it will jump up and down on your head.

Gebgetcimcut's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Gebgetcimcut's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about spacetime near rats while wearing blue boots and balancing five iron spheres on your feet.

2. Erect a giant white sculpture of Gebgetcimcut in the centre of the settlement.

3. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Gebgetcimcut.

4. Learn nine new languages a year.

5. Always treat dolphins with great respect.