Montarril is a god.

She takes the form of a very long, almighty crab.

Montarril created carbon seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Montarril, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Montarril, she will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Montarril's most sacred site is Basalorum in Sweden.

Montarril's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Never think about special relativity.

3. Always wear brown.

4. You must pray to Montarril four times a day.

5. Do not listen to heathen tongues.