Xenhiv is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, unthinking skunk.

Xenhiv created the Andromeda Galaxy five million years ago.

If you believe in Xenhiv, he will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Xenhiv, he will turn you into a sparrow.

Xenhiv's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Xenhiv's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear gray clothing.

2. Never eat figs.

3. Always take life seriously.

4. Never think about ultrasonics.

5. Never think about optics near voles while wearing green corsets and balancing four platinum spheres on your face.