Bigbesslip is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, able chinchilla.

Bigbesslip created everything that exists five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bigbesslip, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Bigbesslip, he will cry a lot.

Bigbesslip's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Bigbesslip's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear jumpers.

2. Respect your elders.

3. Never talk about ants.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.