Ratvid is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, dishonourable cobra.

Ratvid created the world two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ratvid, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Ratvid, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Ratvid's most sacred site is Insel in Germany.

Ratvid's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from white dogs, for they are unholy.

2. Do not eat gooseberries.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.