Pankanhap is a god.

He takes the form of a very long, weak manatee.

Pankanhap created dark matter three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pankanhap, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Pankanhap, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Pankanhap's most sacred site is Snapp in Sweden.

Pankanhap's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Put Pankanhap first in all things.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Never hurt cats.

5. Never eat green fruit.