Fidfarnlarp is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, temperamental deer.

Fidfarnlarp created carbon four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fidfarnlarp, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fidfarnlarp, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Fidfarnlarp's most sacred site is Questenberg in Germany.

Fidfarnlarp's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Never think ill of sick aardvarks.

3. Never talk about fire.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always wear gray.