Fabgofkan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, unjust hydra.

Fabgofkan created a photon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fabgofkan, it will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Fabgofkan, it will turn you into a duck.

Fabgofkan's most sacred site is Yongding in China.

Fabgofkan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear mauve ear rings.

2. Always help foxes.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Erect six platinum sculptures of Fabgofkan on top of important buildings.

5. You must pray to Fabgofkan five times a day.