Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, overgenerous dog.

Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim created everything that exists two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim, it will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim's most sacred site is Manamedu in India.

Pasdussbiss Flatbetcim's Holy Commandments

1. Learn eight new languages a year.

2. Pigs are not to be trusted.

3. Never think about evolution by means of natural selection.

4. Always make sure there are no bats in a building before entering it.

5. Pray towards the south.