Bisswitlarp is a god.
He takes the form of a minute, ruthless
hamster.
Bisswitlarp created the planet Saturn nine trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Bisswitlarp, he will give you a free planet.
If you do not believe in
Bisswitlarp, he will turn you into a plant.
Bisswitlarp's most sacred site is Chilhac in France.
Bisswitlarp's Holy Commandments1. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.
2. Do not make images of living things.
3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.
4. Never paint your back turquoise.
5. Learn four new languages a year.