Tonklopnab is a god.

It takes the form of a small, unfair clam.

Tonklopnab created humanity two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tonklopnab, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tonklopnab, it will turn you into a sheep.

Tonklopnab's most sacred site is Ylike in Finland.

Tonklopnab's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured foxes.

2. Never think about gravity near rats while wearing turquoise tights and balancing nine tin spheres on your legs.

3. Do not wear iron on your body.

4. Do not kill ducks.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.