Bifbatjambedtip is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, sapient goat.

Bifbatjambedtip created the Sombrero Galaxy two years ago.

If you believe in Bifbatjambedtip, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bifbatjambedtip, she will attempt to scare you with hail.

Bifbatjambedtip's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Bifbatjambedtip's Holy Commandments

1. Look mercifully on unfortunate porpoises.

2. Do not hurt great tits.

3. Never feed lots of melons to whales while wearing purple skirts.

4. Never think about spacetime near gulls while wearing white boots and balancing eight silver spheres on your head.

5. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.