Dapdoddog is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, all-powerful whale.

Dapdoddog created viruses two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dapdoddog, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dapdoddog, it will turn you into a hamster.

Dapdoddog's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dapdoddog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Never skip in holy places.

3. Never talk about birds.

4. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always look after injured great tits.