Karzakflanlarg is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, stupid dugong.

Karzakflanlarg created oxygen five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Karzakflanlarg, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Karzakflanlarg, he will send twenty two thousand, three hundred, and seventy eight badgers to sort you out.

Karzakflanlarg's most sacred site is Pisterzo in Italy.

Karzakflanlarg's Holy Commandments

1. Always take life seriously.

2. Erect a giant lead sculpture of Karzakflanlarg in the centre of the settlement.

3. Never talk about asteroids.

4. Run away if nine grasshopers approach from the west.

5. Always make sure there are no ants in a building before entering it.