Fabzanbed is a god.

She takes the form of a three hundred metre long, awe-inspiring goose.

Fabzanbed created the Sun six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fabzanbed, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fabzanbed, she will denounce you as a heretic.

Fabzanbed's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Fabzanbed's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never think about dark matter near dolphins while wearing black shorts and balancing three lead spheres on your arms.

3. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Fabzanbed in the centre of the settlement.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Always obey Fabzanbed's priests.