Titjindid is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, passionate squid.

Titjindid created a photon two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Titjindid, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Titjindid, he will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Titjindid's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Titjindid's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention badgers.

2. Never jump near tapirs.

3. Never feed lots of peanuts to shrews while wearing brown ear rings.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always look after injured frogs.