Tettijap is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, all-powerful donkey.

Tettijap created vertebrates eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tettijap, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Tettijap, he will have a low opinion of you.

Tettijap's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Tettijap's Holy Commandments

1. Never skip in holy places.

2. Do not wear gray clothing.

3. Always help sick foxes.

4. Never wear orange dresses.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Tettijap on top of all buildings.