Cedkimgig is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, overgenerous dryad.

Cedkimgig created viruses four million years ago.

If you believe in Cedkimgig, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Cedkimgig, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Cedkimgig's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Cedkimgig's Holy Commandments

1. Always make a point of helping unfortunate snails.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Voles are not to be trusted.

4. Never feed bread to snakes while wearing indigo kilts.

5. Never talk about ants.