Hinfatran is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, weak jellyfish.

Hinfatran created the Tadpole Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Hinfatran, he will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Hinfatran, he will turn you into a plant.

Hinfatran's most sacred site is Pialeia in Greece.

Hinfatran's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

4. Hide if five cats approach from the east.

5. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.