Vendibnill is a god.

He takes the form of a gargantuan, temperamental dove.

Vendibnill created the Sun nine million years ago.

If you believe in Vendibnill, he will not care.

If you do not believe in Vendibnill, he will turn you into a rock.

Vendibnill's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Vendibnill's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six monkeys approach from the north.

2. Never feed spinach to shrews while wearing cyan kilts.

3. Always look after injured aardvarks.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near grasshopers while wearing orange tights.

5. Do not trade with those who eat aubergines.