Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg is a god.

He takes the form of a small, able wolf.

Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg created the Large Magellanic Cloud three billion years ago.

If you believe in Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg, he will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg, he will turn you into a goat.

Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear silicon on your body.

2. Do not take Jatstragquagdanbamdubsanweg's name in vain.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate moths.

4. Always help sick mice.

5. Always stare at clouds.