Femlidzan Tailgumbet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, compassionate meerkat.

Femlidzan Tailgumbet created a Higgs boson seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Femlidzan Tailgumbet, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Femlidzan Tailgumbet, she will strike you with lightening.

Femlidzan Tailgumbet's most sacred site is Gara in Hungary.

Femlidzan Tailgumbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip in public.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Draw representations of moons on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Femlidzan Tailgumbet loves seals, so they must be respected.