Bosslaknad Sugwipfag is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, slow armadillo.

Bosslaknad Sugwipfag created a down quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Bosslaknad Sugwipfag, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Bosslaknad Sugwipfag, it will manifest in front of you.

Bosslaknad Sugwipfag's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Bosslaknad Sugwipfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about dwarf planets.

2. Always pray immersed in water.

3. Never write about ribonucleic acid.

4. Never think about quantum mechanics near moths while wearing purple boots and balancing seven iron spheres on your feet.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Bosslaknad Sugwipfag.