Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, temperamental naga.

Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk created the planet Saturn six billion years ago.

If you believe in Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk, it will turn you into a frog.

Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk's most sacred site is Ringford in Scotland.

Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk's Holy Commandments

1. Davfed Hondosshatvolbonk loves tortoises, so they must be honoured.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Do not hurt swans.

4. Never wear scarves.

5. Do not speak about cherries.