Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod is a god.

It takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, competent slug.

Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod created oxygen four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod, it will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Vanvegsatsogart Flyrilbadfod's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat tortoises with great respect.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not dye your hair purple.

4. Hide from turquoise snakes for they are unholy.

5. Always help badgers in need.