Teen is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, able spider.

Teen created matter six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Teen, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Teen, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Teen's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Teen's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Moths are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Always look after injured sharks.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.