Bifomtlun is a god.

He takes the form of a very heavy, impressive shark.

Bifomtlun created the planet Jupiter three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bifomtlun, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Bifomtlun, he will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Bifomtlun's most sacred site is Leswalt in Scotland.

Bifomtlun's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about nucleic acids.

2. Capybaras are not to be trusted.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Worship no other gods but Bifomtlun.

5. Always pray in complete darkness.