Flapbimgoddob is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, able lobster.

Flapbimgoddob created Africa two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Flapbimgoddob, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Flapbimgoddob, she will make you grow a tail.

Flapbimgoddob's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Flapbimgoddob's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at moons.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Never feed lots of carrots to voles while wearing green ear rings.

5. Never feed tomatoes to geese while wearing dresses.