Labfensas is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, unthinking gorilla.

Labfensas created the Virgo Supercluster three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Labfensas, she will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Labfensas, she will turn you into a rock.

Labfensas' most sacred site is Demsin in Germany.

Labfensas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear indigo clothing.

2. Labfensas loves grasshopers, so they must be honoured.

3. Never think about dark energy near otters while wearing pink stockings and balancing seven platinum spheres on your arms.

4. Never bounce in the presence of ants.

5. Do not make images of living things.