Vabstipyamgupgamstan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely thin, ruthless duck.

Vabstipyamgupgamstan created dark energy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vabstipyamgupgamstan, it will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Vabstipyamgupgamstan, it will try to impress you with trees.

Vabstipyamgupgamstan's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Vabstipyamgupgamstan's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear rings.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Never look at nebulae.

5. Never go into orange rooms.