Lagfubnut is a god.

She takes the form of a very thin, merciful hydra.

Lagfubnut created life two billion years ago.

If you believe in Lagfubnut, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Lagfubnut, she will be very sad.

Lagfubnut's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Lagfubnut's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap near aardvarks.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Learn nine new languages a year.

4. Do not laugh in public.

5. Retreat if eight shrews approach from the north.