Kenbuggarzag is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, all-knowing dog.

Kenbuggarzag created the cosmos five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kenbuggarzag, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Kenbuggarzag, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Kenbuggarzag's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Kenbuggarzag's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near porpoises while wearing yellow dresses.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near moths while wearing pink stockings and balancing eight silicon spheres on your legs.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity near frogs while wearing orange boots and balancing five nickel spheres on your arms.

5. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Kenbuggarzag on top of all buildings.