Quafpomtam is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, strong aardvark.

Quafpomtam created Asia seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Quafpomtam, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Quafpomtam, she will ignore you.

Quafpomtam's most sacred site is Askos in Greece.

Quafpomtam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Pray towards the south.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not drink water in magenta rooms.