Faggarxem is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, able spider.

Faggarxem created the Black Eye Galaxy nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Faggarxem, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Faggarxem, it will be very unhappy.

Faggarxem's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Faggarxem's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

2. Squirrels are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Erect a giant purple sculpture of Faggarxem in the centre of the settlement.

4. Learn seven new languages a year.

5. Do not hurt monkeys.