Ragmitcan is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, calm horse.

Ragmitcan created life nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ragmitcan, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Ragmitcan, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Ragmitcan's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Ragmitcan's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never run in the presence of cats.

3. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

4. Swans are not to be trusted.

5. Run away from turquoise aardvarks, for they are unholy.