Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif is a god.

He takes the form of a huge, dishonest bird.

Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif created the Black Eye Galaxy six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif, he will be mildly annoyed.

Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Erect seven copper sculptures of Nuljadlabarp Barnkadmif on top of important buildings.

3. Never write about solid mechanics.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.

5. Do not speak about limes.