Lengarpak is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, tranquil tortoise.

Lengarpak created everything that exists five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lengarpak, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Lengarpak, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Lengarpak's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Lengarpak's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat gulls with great respect.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Never hurt grasshopers.

4. Do not wear titanium on your body.

5. Run away if eight snails approach from the east.