Volbapgod is a god.

She takes the form of a six thousand metre long, narcissistic rhinoceros.

Volbapgod created the planet Venus four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Volbapgod, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Volbapgod, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Volbapgod's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Volbapgod's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from purple swans, for they are unholy.

2. Never eat green fruit.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force.

4. Doves are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Never write about gravity.