Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg is a god.

He takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, unfair chinchilla.

Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg created vertebrates three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg, he will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg, he will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Nuttafnab Dinvogqueeg's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Never write about photosynthesis.

3. Do not shave your arms.

4. Never bounce near monkeys.

5. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.