Bigwatfub is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, omniscient dryad.

Bigwatfub created the Whirlpool Galaxy five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Bigwatfub, she will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Bigwatfub, she will destroy your home solar system.

Bigwatfub's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Bigwatfub's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about gravity near monkeys while wearing green shoes and balancing seven tin spheres on your hands.

2. Do not keep eight swans in a large pit.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. You must never eat carrots.

5. You must pray to Bigwatfub three times a day.