Yaklunflap is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, irritating yak.

Yaklunflap created a top quark two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Yaklunflap, he will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Yaklunflap, he will destroy your favourite solar system.

Yaklunflap's most sacred site is Uruachi in Mexico.

Yaklunflap's Holy Commandments

1. Walk at least nine thousand metres per day.

2. Geese are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never hurt tortoises.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not chop down trees.