Veenbambess is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, deceitful pigeon.

Veenbambess created Mount Everest three million years ago.

If you believe in Veenbambess, he will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Veenbambess, he will turn you into a mouse.

Veenbambess' most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Veenbambess' Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Do not speak about grapes.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Do not dye your hair orange.