Narlwabomin is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, sapient naga.

Narlwabomin created the planet Saturn nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Narlwabomin, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Narlwabomin, she will try to impress you with trees.

Narlwabomin's most sacred site is Camon in France.

Narlwabomin's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about asteroids.

2. Always help sick snakes.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Always look after injured doves.

5. Run away from red frogs, for they are unholy.