Betgenbag is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, thoughtless hippopotamus.

Betgenbag created carbon three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Betgenbag, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Betgenbag, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Betgenbag's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Betgenbag's Holy Commandments

1. Do not keep three sharks in a large pit.

2. Dogs are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Always look after injured goats.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.