Nelcidfarn is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, two-faced dingo.

Nelcidfarn created the Whirlpool Galaxy two million years ago.

If you believe in Nelcidfarn, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nelcidfarn, he will curse you with boils.

Nelcidfarn's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Nelcidfarn's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about aardvarks.

2. Erect six titanium sculptures of Nelcidfarn on top of important buildings.

3. Do not make images of living things.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Do not trade with those who eat nuts.