Bapwiklim is a god.

She takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, grumpy chicken.

Bapwiklim created the universe six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bapwiklim, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Bapwiklim, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Bapwiklim's most sacred site is Quenstedt in Germany.

Bapwiklim's Holy Commandments

1. Always help otters in need.

2. Never think about quantum gravity.

3. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

4. Voles are unholy and should not be approached.

5. You must pray to Bapwiklim eight times a day.