Bamzen Cissfumlid is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, unthinking weasel.

Bamzen Cissfumlid created the Milkyway three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Bamzen Cissfumlid, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Bamzen Cissfumlid, he will not care at all.

Bamzen Cissfumlid's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Bamzen Cissfumlid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not speak about peanuts.

2. Draw representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Feed all hungry bats.

4. Always help geese.

5. Paint representations of stars on the walls of your dwelling place in blue.