Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, pitiless narwhal.

Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak created the Black Eye Galaxy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak, she will have a very low opinion of you.

Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak's most sacred site is Aranganur in India.

Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Always obey Kinlaplabfad Hitnuttrilpak's priests.

3. Learn seven new languages a year.

4. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

5. Do not drink water in red rooms.