Negsadmabjarn is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, dishonest chinchilla.

Negsadmabjarn created Africa four million years ago.

If you believe in Negsadmabjarn, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Negsadmabjarn, he will say rude things about you at parties.

Negsadmabjarn's most sacred site is Estedt in Germany.

Negsadmabjarn's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shave your chest.

2. Do not dye your hair indigo.

3. Always make sure there are no doves in a room before entering it.

4. Do not speak about nuts.

5. Do not listen to music.