Armtonrill is a god.

It takes the form of a giant, egotistical crab.

Armtonrill created the planet Mars five million years ago.

If you believe in Armtonrill, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Armtonrill, it will destroy your favourite planet.

Armtonrill's most sacred site is Oppin in Germany.

Armtonrill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink alcohol.

2. Do not drink water in white rooms.

3. Pigs are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not speak about spinach.

5. Never talk about fire.